sorry to hear it is going hard for you i have know some people with OCD and i know it is hard they can not help them self the best i can say is it is like people that smok and do drags they wont to stop but they just can not. it will take time and doing one thing at a time from what you have said i thing your going for all at once just start with one thing at a time can you put your willfulness in to boxes like you must do this in one box and you can not do this in the next box and work on one thing at a time like if you have to do some thing at 10 am alway have your Master move it to 10 15 then 2 week later go to 1030 as willfulness can cover alot of thing you can not deal with it all in one go

i hope this helps