death of your sub/slave

[Raysofsun]

A good question to ask though I would think each answer will be different as people tend to react differently.Myself I lost My /t girl/slave/mother/grandmother in oct last year.tis 6 mths on and I still feel numb and could not even envisage taking another.Let Me say she and I where together for near 40 yrs and at this moment in time I cannot see how anyone could take her place.All her stuff is still here as I havnt the will to throw it or give it away.It hurts deep down --oh sure I can paste a smiley face on easily but in truth the pain after living and loving her for so long cannot even be described--it is a case of day by day getting by and making ready for the next day without My girl by My side.I repeat this is My feelings and I expect others will feel similar after such a length of times but all will handle it in their own particular way

[Lisais mine]

I dont think i would ever be the same. I just dont know. I have always had a pretty good reaction to death, but i am not sure if i would have the direction to continue, or if my heart would just stop. Damn. i dont think i have ever felt like this. My grandma was the closest person to me. and i nursed her till her death of liver cancer. I feel that close to lisa. I hope i die first, so i dont have to deal with it at all. selfish, i know, but honest.