This may draw heat, but I personally don't believe in "topping from the bottom." IMO it's all about providing a mutually satisfactory expererience for both partners involved, and actively listening to her is a very easy way of working things out

It sounds like you've run into the same problem I did (and still do) as another recent convert; there is oodles of information for new submissives, but not so much for dominants, of either gender. So take it slow, figure out what works best, and and stick with that No need to get really extreme when you're just getting into it.

The other thing to remember is that "discipline" need not be corporal punishment. There are lots of ways to get creative there- edging, having her do a chore she dislikes (cleaning the house out, perhaps?) and a million other things Again, all that matters is that it works for the two of you; there is no One True Way, no one-size-fits-all approach. Every person- and every relationship between them- is different.