I've heard that

[alura]

For once we are on opposite sides.....still it is all so individual, how can you just say 'this is what I want?'? Being real means being real.

TG - Why don't you tell us what you really think?

Seriously, excellent points, harsh or should I say firm, but excellent.

Alura - while what you are spouting is on the opposite end of the spectrum, there is a place for those of us in-between.

[BDSM_Tourguide]

still it is all so individual, how can you just say 'this is what I want?'

You can say that, because these things are individual. You're not saying this is what all submissives want; you're saying "this is what I want." "These are my expectations, not the expectations of a community."

[alura]

That is exactly what I'm NOT saying.

You can say that, because these things are individual. You're not saying this is what all submissives want; you're saying "this is what I want." "These are my expectations, not the expectations of a community."

[BDSM_Tourguide]

That is exactly what I'm NOT saying.

Okay. I'm lost.

[Ruby]

For once we are on opposite sides.....still it is all so individual, how can you just say 'this is what I want?'? Being real means being real.

Alura - I always know what I want. I might change my mind a million times a second, but for any given moment at a random point in time, I know what I want and I make steps to get it.

So, while I have the perogitive to change my mind as new information is input, I don't have to change my mind. It's all about choice. If I didn't know what I wanted, how could I say I found it, had it, or didn't have it?

Side note for me: Happiness is having what I want and questing for the things I want, but don't have yet. Happiness is also being able to distinguish between a want and a need.

Old sayings to think about emphasizing "Know Thyself"

If you don't know where you're going, any road will take your there.

If you don't know what you want, you are not likely to get it.

If you don't know what makes you happy, you are not likely to find your happiness.

Bangles Song:

If she knew what she wants...He'd be giving it to her,
If she knew what she needs...He could give her that, too...