how would you prefer your first introduction to submission

[Lord Douche]

Thread moved to My BDSM Life.

Dunno why I didn't move this earlier. It could fit in Knowledge Base too, but it seems more personal than that.

LD

[Sir Lanceloth]

Thread moved to My BDSM Life.

Dunno why I didn't move this earlier. It could fit in Knowledge Base too, but it seems more personal than that.

LD

Well that was the first place i concidered placing it, changed my mind for som reason.

[MrJerseyGuy]

It seemed to me that the poster was asking how to "introduce" the subject into the relationship. Maybe I'm wrong. Anyway, I liked it because it reminds me of how I got into it. I'm over two years into the best relationship I've ever had and DEFINATELY the best sex I've ever had. My g/f actually introduced the subject. We had just finished having sex one day in the beginning and she made a simple observation..."Too bad you don't have a headboard." I said "Why?" and she answered..."Because you don't have anything to tie me too."

I'm so glad she made that comment because, in spite of my interest, I would never have brought it up for fear of being thought of as a pervert by her.

In any event, I had the big I-bolts drilled into the walls next to the beed the next day and it's been an adventure ever since. We just recently bought a house together and within the first week she asked me to install the I-bolts in our new bedroom

I say...GO FOR IT!

[Sir Lanceloth]

It seemed to me that the poster was asking how to "introduce" the subject into the relationship. Maybe I'm wrong. Anyway, I liked it because it reminds me of how I got into it. I'm over two years into the best relationship I've ever had and DEFINATELY the best sex I've ever had. My g/f actually introduced the subject. We had just finished having sex one day in the beginning and she made a simple observation..."Too bad you don't have a headboard." I said "Why?" and she answered..."Because you don't have anything to tie me too."

I'm so glad she made that comment because, in spite of my interest, I would never have brought it up for fear of being thought of as a pervert by her.

In any event, I had the big I-bolts drilled into the walls next to the beed the next day and it's been an adventure ever since. We just recently bought a house together and within the first week she asked me to install the I-bolts in our new bedroom

I say...GO FOR IT!

point taken The thing is i have allready opened up for this with her. her first reaction: "a lot of cursing" followed by "a lot of crying". the thing was, that was the thing she feared the most! But after a lot of talk and time, it now seems to me that the reason she feared it, was simply because it was something for her lucky me. she has allways been a scared of her own sexuality, perhaps others here have had it the same way? I too started out being scared of my own sexuality, my way of doing it was simply to forget, ignore and excuse. My turning point was me taking the desicion to figure out my own sexuality, and those damm porn sites "extreme torutre" etc does not help! what helped was sites like this one, i believe it was latches that made me think "i want that".

[Sir Lanceloth]

It seemed to me that the poster was asking how to "introduce" the subject into the relationship.

oops it seems i forgot to answer on that. What i wanted with this thread was to get ideas hot to avoid the pitfalls just after introducing the desire. I presume what you meant by introducing a subject into a relationship is based on the more practical side (tie this knot here etc ) and if thats the case then you are partially right. I also want to know what the more experienced today think would have been the best introduction to bdsm. This introduction does not have to be sex, i have thought of tying my gf up, and serving her dessert just to show her that it isnt all about sex.

I am not a slave in the 'real world', so calling someone master feels false to me. 'Sir' is simply a term of respect - perhaps she would find that easier?

Thanks, currently we have decided to call each other by name, that way we also try to avoid falling into any stereotypes. Not much fun being forced to follow a role that isnt what you want to do. I find it hard to find any good porn out there, its all about pain, torture, rape etc. So instead i have decided to only take the elements i like, and use them in my own way.