Vanilla/Kink Crossroad

[BDSM_Tourguide]

One of the better discussions, I think. Worth reading for Jones, Nikka's astounding contributions.

[Domme]

One of the better discussions, I think. Worth reading for Jones, Nikka's astounding contributions.

I agree! Thanks for bumping it up; I'd probably have missed it otherwise.

For me, having a partner who is open-minded, adventurous, and completely accepting of her darker side and mine has helped me tremendously in the still-ongoing process of accepting this part of me.

I grew up in a violent atmosphere, and I hated it. Hated it. Hated it. My perceptions of who I wanted to be, the type of person I wanted to be, and who I thought I'd become, all based on that loathing, were tossed into complete disarray when I finally acknowledged that I love to dominate and control. I thrill at the sensations of giving My sub the love pain she craves. And that, my new friends, was completely contrary to the vanilla persona I'd wrapped around myself for many, many years. The self-image shattered, and the shards were cutting me to pieces as I tried navigating my way through the mess. It was My sub partner who gave me the first positive words I could tentatively grasp onto as an emotional lifeline.

"I want the pain you want to give. I want to submit to you fully. Giving you that and accepting what you want to give me in return is empowering for me, because I know I have the choice. I know that you will never cause pain in a hurtful way. I want all of you, and that includes these parts of you. I love you. I love who you are. I love all of who you are."

Though I still struggle within myself at times, she's never failed those words. Or failed me. she is my strength.