Quote Originally Posted by Pinkanimegirl View Post
I am very loyal and not sure how that would effect our relationship especially since it would kill me to see him have sex with someone else. Opinions and advice?
Have you miswrote or are you getting ahead of yourself. Your partner will have sex with you then the other man will. How then is your partner having sex with anybody else? It'sa possible next step when your partner suggests doing it again but with a woman but thats another issue.

In terms of bdsm loyalty and obendiance, the answer is clear. You should express your concerns to him. He may (should) then change his mind and drop the idea. If not you have the following options:

1) Do as you are told - that's obediance.
2) Add this to the list of hard limits in your relationship
3) End the relationship
4) Redefine the relationship so what bdsm says doesn't come into it.

The root problem here is a common one. It is the failure of the couple to establish soft and hard limits. On one level its understandable. You dont kick off relationship by listing like a lawyer drafting a contact all the things you wont do. But on another you would think the topic would come up in conversation or fantasy role play.

You must certainly talk it over. Who knows perhaps you will enjoy it. I can't see your partner just watching as the other man is in bed with you. It almost certainly is going to develop into a threesome. But on the other side it can be a dangerous roadl. What if it turns into a regular thing. What if the man pesters to have sex behind your partners back. What if your partner wants MFF and then develops strong feelings for the other woman. What if partner thinks he would like seeing you with another man but then when it happens it changes his feelings. Lots of pleasures with a threesome but lots of potential pains,. I have had threesomes (and more) on several occassions. I like them, it works for me but its not for everybody. Discuss it.

And there is the possibility to go half way. Lets say your partner makes you strip in front of him and another man. Maybe he spanks you. flogs you. Maybe he lets the other man spank you. Maybe you have to give both BJs. But no sex with the other man no sleeping. The benefit of going halfway is to tiptoe the water to see how both you and he feel about itl. You may change your minds.

Finally, should you decide to go through with it and are looking for the other man, I'd be happy to volunteer my services